17 Comments

Thanks Sam for more of your honest, heartfelt writing. Thankfully I never became a huge fan of coke. During my time working in the music industry in London in the 90s, I knew many users and their dealers, and it was always on offer if I wanted it. The drug always came with this tag of glamour in those circles, it was almost de rigeur to have a bang if it was offered. For me it always ended up in a situation where you would need a snort every 5 minutes just to maintain the high, and it became the be-all and end-all of the night to get back there. It dawned on me that it was a truly shit experience, because you were always chasing that first hit, which was never all it was cracked up to be in the first place. The idea of cocaine was always better than the reality...something about the feelings conjured by the word, the idea of it as an expensive 'treat' and its association with decadent 70s rock star living. Maybe it was just me and possibly others didn't experience that feeling of constantly coming down, but ultimately I'm just very glad it didn't get its hooks in me.

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Cheers for the article Sam, great read as always. I am in recovery and whilst I still go to meetings regularly, it’s always good to get identification with another addict. It helps to remember the bad times, while appreciating that there is a way out.

To anyone who connects with what Sam has said, just reach out for help. I did that 3 1/2 years ago and don’t regret it for a second.

I’m also IFS and have my ticket to Brown John booked up, so thanks for your content and looking forward to the live show.

Cheers,

Josh.

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Spot on again Sam - the Cotton analogy fits perfectly- keep em’ coming...

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I'm aware of your work so i will keep it short, best article written about cocaine use for normal functioning fellas... i went from having a few lines at weekend to buying a gram at weekend and then working up to 3 wraps for a oner most days a week, still working and snorting in steady job... that was in 2005... i hate the stuff but havent had any for nearly 2 months and im really proud of myself but reading your article has made me instantly think about getting some (i wont) and thats the insane power the shit has over you.... i haven't dramatically ruined lives through using it but ive got regrets that ive not been a great person at times, mainly money related ... cheers Sam... i know you aint interested in reading ya comments , you still have cocaine self centred attitude without the habit...

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Stumbled across this while frantically googling "How to know when you have fucked your nose beyond belief with coke". You have perfectly described my every inner thought over these last 6-7 years of bring addicted to cocaine. I'm very appreciative that you gave me a chance to laugh at myself and yourself while going through a very shite time. Thank you for writing this. I don't think you realise how many people you are helping even just by being relatable and finding humour in a fucked up situation. I felt great comfort reading this knowing I wasn't alone.

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Hi Sam. My girlfriend has just emerged from doing a lot of coke with her previous partner. When we first met she blames him for upping her usage - from 'a couple of times a year' to a gram most weekends. She described the fear she would feel going for a drink with him and his mates on a Friday and promising she wouldn't do it through to her :suicide Tuesday' comedown. I've never done it but have been around it all my adult life - I'm now 45. I'm very proud of her for kicking the habit - she did people places things without realising she was doing it. But occasionally she still talks about it with a sort of wistfulness. So I guess your article resonated with me. It's a fucking horrid, insidious drug. Thanks for speaking publicly about it.

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What a wonderful piece of writing. I was an utter arsehole (so I'm told) on coke. A change of career, where I was now subject to random drug/alcohol testing, forced me to stop. Reading this shows me where I would have inevitably ended up, and where many of my friends, sadly have. Thanks Sam.

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The best, most authentic, most accurate piece I’ve ever read about this filthy yet so, so superficially beguiling substance.

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Right on the button once more, Sam. To again say you've 'nailed it" falls way short with this one- as others have stated, it could & does now exist readily as a stand-alone Coke 1.01 & Beyond article. As an aid to others wrapped within its grasp, to a trip down memory lane to mindless drug Hoover's, as I also was, thankfully a long, long time ago now.

My use of all.....nothing injectable but everything else, when Coke was beyond the means of most, and definitely myself.....where blues, dexxys, bombers...then Sulphate akimbo...was the way. Thel tale told is unchanged, of course, regardless of gear de jour......and hash, back when it could be had could also run riot if allowed to. Most all of my friends, up until I was 22, and all but stopped the whole shebang, kept going and using all or most of it in greater amounts.

I was married, and it was just not an option, and 20yrs plus would pass with whatever friends remaining still massively linvolced, now dealing heavily, busted repeatedly etc.....but for the grace of whatever, I escaped. I've had respectful dabbles over the years, but for me, I must consider myself fortunate compared to many.

Like you, Sam, re alcohol, I rid myself of binge drinking, which, as a very senior nurse, I only did on days off, strictly, but came close to it being the end of me, and it forcing my hand, mercifully, to stop. This back in 1995, and Me now a guy on the cusp of 40, along with cigarettes, both successfully cold turkeyed and gone to this present day.

It takes, as you've highlighted, huge resolve even for those of us more able, for whatever reason, to turn that particular type of page.

Brilliant, brilliant work, Sam, thank you for the self effacing way you retell your own stories for all of us to enjoy, to benefit from, sincerely thanks, mate, for your time & input....this one truly is an absolute belter!!

So much appreciated buddy.

Lindsay

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